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When Asian people grow up fast they go to college at 13. White people grow up fast it’s about fudge packing and triple D’s at 13. – Adam Carolla
You’re 28, why are you going to goth clubs? Do what I do, sit at home & wait to die. You don’t have to kill yourself, you’re just waiting. – Adam Carolla
I had two thoughts about it. One was I could do that, and the next one was I’ll never get to do that. – Adam Carolla
Chicks named Tammy have a greater chance of actually driving a Mercedes than a chick named Mercedes. – Adam Carolla