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If you just try long enough and hard enough, you can always manage to boot yourself in the posterior. – A. J. Liebling
In trying to avoid one sin I’ve committed another. – A. J. Jacobs
A bear, however hard he tries, grows tubby without exercise. – A. A. Milne
A Proper Tea is much nicer than a Very Nearly Tea, which is one you forget about afterwards. – A. A. Milne